Friday, 7 October 2016

I'm In A Relationship: Don't End In 'Had I know'

It's good to be in a relationship but it's worse when what you experience in it lands you in a lamentable state of 'Had I know'.
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Many young men and women have been exposed to bitter consequences in a love relationship such as deception, premarital sex, abortion, unwanted pregnancy, guilt and condemnation, STDs and other issues due to their lack of knowledge.
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Who do we blame for such lamentation?
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The major cause of this regrettable statement of 'Had I know' is ignorance. You'll hear some ladies chorus this statement when the outcome of their lives couldn't undo what they have now known. Likewise, men aren't left out too. Words like 'I wish I had not done it', 'I wish I didn't join them or had that fun'; are utterances coming out from the state of regret.
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Are you in a relationship? Here are the things you need to know so that you won't end up in the regrettable state of 'Had I know'.
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1. Sex before or outside marriage doesn't equate love
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Many are still naive as to clearly differentiate between sex and love. They are two words that do not mean the same thing. It's very possible to have sex without love and it's possible to love without having sex in an opposite sex relationship.
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Anyone that's luring you into sex before or outside marriage is trying to drive you into a state of lamentation in life. It's up to you to make the right choice.
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How I wish many would believe and understand that sex is ONLY meant to be explored in marriage and not anywhere outside or before it. If you dance to his or her tune of sex before or outside marriage, you'll face the music yourself.
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2. That everyone is doing it doesn't make it right
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Friends could tell you everyone's going to club, drinking alcohol, catching fun, using what they have to get what they want, indulging in boyfriend and girlfriend relationship where immorality is the order of the relationship.
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May I tell you the real truth? That everyone is doing it doesn't make it right. To man, majority carries the vote but to God, minority wins His approval. God is more pleased when they're few people who adhere to His law than consider the multitude that turned away from Him.
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Don't let this lie from the pit of hell push you into a situation where you'll forever hate yourself.
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3. Don't buy the 'truth' that would destroy your life
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That a thing is true doesn't mean it's acceptable before God when it negates His law or exposes you to terrible consequences.
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Don't buy the 'truths' sold in Nollywood and Hollywood, they lack godly and eternal values. That they seem to be socially acceptable doesn't mean God endorsed it. And when you live your life based on them, be ready to face the consequence of what they give.
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Buy the truth that comes from God because it's the only truth that can set you free. Any other truths from the world will put your life in bondage and regrets.
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4. Don't base life's decision on promise
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Now that the end of the world is fast approaching, men and women are becoming truce breakers. Many are quick to make promises and swift to breach them when they've gotten what they want.
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That he or she promise to marry you or help you doesn't mean you should jump into bed with him or her.
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Marriage is a covenant and not a contract entered into by promise. Don't be deceived by 'I will marry you if...', once you execute the 'if', you'll know their true intent. Life's decision requires a thoughtful and prayerful consideration before you embark on them, otherwise you'll end up in regrets.
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5. Don't prove a point when you can boldly say NO
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Just because some people wants to prove a point with their feminity or masculinity; they've indulged in the act that ended up destroying their lives which they cannot recover from.
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It's very good to walk away and accept the shame amidst your peers, with a preserved life than to prove a point and become addicted to the act. Cultivate the power to say NO and mean it than to seek and prove a point that would destroy your life.
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The ignorance you entertain today could put your life in the state of regret. Don't allow that relationship to push you into a state of lamentation where you wish you could have done it better or avoided it. Don't allow yourself be pushed into the state of 'Had I know' as a result of the choice you made in life.
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© Mayowa Adeniyi 2016

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