Tuesday, 4 April 2017

Why Dating Isn't Ok.

Dating to several people means different things but one general meaning accorded to it is a non-platonic relationship that exist between the opposite sex.
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Dating, has become a popular act people practice to know whom their potential marital partner would be. It's a term that stems out from the western world and has crept into the Christian faith. They indulge in romance and later graduate to sexual immoralities with the aim of knowing whom to marry.
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Does God categorically stated it in His word that He hates dating? Nay! But there are pointers to it in His word. I'd humbly suggest that you unlearn all the self-help principles you have learnt when it comes to choosing a life partner and learn it the God's way so that you can get the God-kind of result.
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Why does God hate it?
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1. It exposes you to the evil men and women do for 'love' sake
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Because the heart is evil and desperately wicked, dating a man or woman can't make you know everything about the person, it'll only expose you to the evils that people do for love.
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The devil comes to steal, kill and destroy (John 10:10) and he does that to many singles through dating relationship and other means. A larger percentage of youths had have their lives destroyed through dating relationship.
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It's in a dating relationship that premarital sex is defined as love, insecurity and jealousy is termed love, domestic violence is described as weakness and deception is known to be a game amongst others. It's in a dating relationship that some or all relationship issues would surface in your life.
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Why expose your life to daring consequences when you can be in a God approved relationship?
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2. You'd believe you're getting married and the chances are very slim
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Oftentimes you'd hear people say, "We thought we're meant for each other but", "The relationship didn't work out well", "I thought he/she was the right partner for me" and so on.
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Do you know that most of this kind of relationship often leads to regret? And because they think they'll be getting married, they'll be doing what's meant for married folks while single.
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That everyone is in a dating relationship doesn't mean God approves it. Why spend your life on a trial and error kind of relationship when you can get it right with God?
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3. It takes off your dependence from God on guiding you on whom to marry
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How can you depend on God when you're already dating a potential partner? You think the person, dream the person and love the person. Even if good friends are telling you it won't work, you'll be blind to the truth.
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You can't trust God to guide you on whom to marry and be helping yourself at the same time. God doesn't help a man that believes he can help himself. Don't think God approves most dating relationship that leads to marriage. That God is silent about a matter doesn't mean He gave His consent to it.
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4. It tolerates sexual immoralities, premarital sex and other evils done in a relationship
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I have never seen any dating relationship where there are no shades of immoralities in it. They may not land on the bed of premarital sex but they'll be roaming the corridor of sexual immoralities. And anyone that takes fire in his or her bosom would definitely have themselves burned.
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Do not forget that dating involves the assessment of the suitability of a potential marriage partner which doesn't exclude premarital sex and its accomplice. Why go into a dating relationship when you do not want to violate sexual purity or sin against God?
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5. You stand the risk of being heart broken
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I may not be statistically correct but 95% of dating relationship doesn't lead to marriage. Why the rush to waste your life, time and resources on a dating relationship and end up being heart broken or life shattered?
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It's better to give your heart to God who knows the right person that won't break it or jilt you. But when you ignore God, you stand the risk of being heart broken.
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7. It's ungodly
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Any relationship that violate godly principles will ultimately expose you to bitter consequences and dating is one of them.
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Dating doesn't allow you to promote godliness or the fear of God because you two would believe you're getting married and you'd be doing what's only meant for married people. Copulation isn't meant for boyfriend and girlfriend relationship, engaged singles but only for the married.
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It's ungodly to encourage a dating relationship where you French kiss, share intimate hugs, caress or act as if you're married.
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8. It's unscriptural
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God knows we need relationship with the opposite sex but He has a blueprint for it. "Iron sharpens iron, so a man sharpens the countenance of his friend", (Prov. 27:17). A dating relationship won't sharpen your countenance in life, it'll reduce your strength, blur your dreams, destroy your life and purpose and reduce your destiny to a piece of bread.
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9. You can't know the right partner through dating
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Whether you'd agree or not, you can't know the right partner through dating. That God allowed it to work doesn't mean He's a party to the relationship. If dating is the right channel to marriage, all dating relationship ought to end in marriage.
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You can only know the right partner when you trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding, and in all your ways, you acknowledge Him; then He shall direct your path (Prov. 3:5-7).
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10. There's nothing as Christian dating, you don't blend worldly practices with godly things
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Because the world has entered into the church and vis-a-vis, half-baked men of God now blend worldly practices with godly things. Christ has no fellowship with Belial neither has light got anything to do with darkness.
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Most Christian dating relationships practiced in the church are not different from the worldly type. Don't be deceived that it's labeled 'Christian'. If you want to know who's right for you to marry, pray for His guidance and don't assess one brother or sister.
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It's better you close your two eyes and pray so that you can see clearly when He reveals him or her. Adam wasn't opening his eyes when God caused him to sleep deep. Get off the relationship and pray and don't confuse yourself in that relationship.
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11. Dating isn't just a term, it's an immoral act
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Many believe dating is not a big deal and they ignorantly enter into it only to discover in a short while that they have entered 'one chance'. It's better you quit that immoral relationship before it lands you in the defiled bed of immorality.
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12. It makes you to 'jump' from one partner to the other while assessing their suitability and it leads to frustration
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How can you date one or more persons in search for Mr or Miss Right? Isn't that waste of time, effort and resources? Don't complicate issues for yourself in life. Stay with God and He will lead you aright without frustration and a messed up life.
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I write this to enlighten those who have been deceived that through dating, they'll know the right person because...in the beginning, it was not so. Give your heart to Christ and He will lead you to the right person that won't break or destroy your life.
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© Oluwamayowa Adeniyi 2017

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