Monday, 4 June 2018


Nothing frustrates a woman than having a man who will not talk to her, share his heart, tell her how he feels, will not respond when she asks questions, act cold when angry, get withdrawn, use silence as a weapon or get angry over little things.
Are these men emotional at all? Why can't he say, "I love you" to his woman? Why can't he tell her what is bothering him when she asks? Why does he keep quiet sometimes when they are together? Is he fed up of her? Is he bored with the relationship? Is he tired of the marriage? Is he having an affair? What then is the problem? Why won't your man, your husband, talk to you?
You have to understand that men are wired differently from women, that is why you got attracted to him in the first place; his ruggedness, his manliness, his gentleness and quietness made you go into cloud 9 for him hoping you will turn him into a charming, bubbly, conversational lover after marriage, but he won't turn into a woman after marriage, he will keep being the man!
1. Understand that, men are not talkers by nature, they are fixers. Instead of talking about a problem, they like to fix it. While you are busy worrying, he is busy thinking. Thinking is a man's world.
2. Understand that men love to have quiet time for themselves where they can unwind and think through a problem. Every man needs that quiet time away from every one, pressures and demands where they can think through their problem.
3. Understand that a man like to act than talk. He prefers to show you love by buying you things, helping out, taking you out or making love than saying "I love you". Our culture has trained men to be masculine about their feelings. Most men find it difficult expressing those 3 words though they have to learn it. Women love to hear those 3 magic words over and over again!
4. Understand that men don't know how to express their feelings: frustration, pain and sadness. They sometimes get them.out through anger or escape.
5. Understand that men don't know how to handle rejection. Men are scared of being ridiculed, shamed, disgraced, embarrassed when they are vulnerable to you. He is afraid to show you his soft side and weaknesses so you don't use it against him.
6. Understand that men are worried when bills are not paid, there is a family crisis, responsibilities are piling high and he is incapacitated, this can deflate his erection and withdraw from physical intimacy especially sex as well.
The list goes on and on. Don't take it personal when your man acts like a man, rather show empathy and understanding:
1. Let him have quite time whenever he needs it.
2. Allow him to unwind by watching football or going for exercise. It helps him relieve stress.
3. Don't use his weaknesses, secrets and failures against him, he will shut down completely and never open his heart to you again.
4. Learn to praise, admire, honour and respect him.
5. Learn to think solution to problems. Men love women who are result-oriented rather than problem-oriented, this helps him wants to talk to you.
6. Men have emotions too, they just may not express it as you do.
Learn him non-verbal affection. Hug him, rub his back, peck him, be his friend-his best friend.
Show him understanding. Allow him to be the man.
When a man feels loved and accepted, he will open his heart to you, show you deeper love and affection, bond with you, become romantic, get intimate and make you the greatest treasure of his life.
Watch out for the other side: HOW TO SHOW LOVE TO YOUR WOMAN AND MAKE HER OPEN HER HEART TO YOU. You will enjoy it!

Thanks for reading. God bless you. Cheers!

© Seun Oladele.

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