Tuesday, 17 July 2018


There are some things I hear during counseling that gets me angry, honestly. You don't trust your partner one bit and you still want to marry them, what the hell do you think you are doing?

Someone said, "A relationship without trust is like a dead man waiting to be buried." Once there is no trust in courtship, your marriage is a disaster going somewhere to happen!

I notice most virgin guys don't trust their non-virgin fiancees.

They keep asking stupid questions about all the guys around her, scrutinize her phone and keep wandering if she slept with all her friends and course mates too. You confess your past which is fine, but you still keep in touch with all your EX and even allow them to flirt shamelessly with you, how in the name of God do you expect the guy to trust you? Same with non-virgin guys dating virgin ladies but keep in touch with their sexually experienced EX, keep sleeping with her like mad, like crazy and expect their virgin fiancees to trust them, how?

It's the reason I don't blame virgins who insist they must marry virgins like themselves, they believe it will reduce some drama and automatically clear some trust issues! Though not in all cases if God is not involved, a virgin can shatter your heart to pieces as well as a non-virgin unless they are your true bone and flesh, marrying God's will is the most important and ultimate decision you will make in marriage!

Trust in courtship/marriage is not cheap! If you want your partner to trust you beyond every shadow of trust, then you must prove it!

1. Do away with all your EX. If you are still interested in them, end your courtship in peace and go right ahead and marry your EX!

2. Stop hiding your phone. For what?

3. Stop flirting with the opposite sex.

4. Stop comparing them with your past lovers.

5. Stop romancing and having sex with them. Having sex with your partner in courtship is a sure sign you lack self control. If you can disobey God enough to do it with them, you will disobey Him and do it with someone else!

6. Stop telling lies.

7. Stop speaking half truth.

8. Stop keeping friends with people of questionable character.

9. Stop keeping late nights.

10. Be loyal and faithful to your partner always.

11. Stop having secret and questionable chats with the opposite sex on the social media.

If these are not in place, you are with the wrong person and your marriage will not work! I hope this post is clear enough? 

Thanks for reading. 

God bless you. 


© Seun.Oladele

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