Thursday, 6 September 2018

HOW MUCH OF MY PAST SHOULD I TELL MY PARTNER?

Everyone has a past. No one is a saint! I've counselled so many virgins who have been involved in romance, dirty acts, fingering, lesbianism, homosexuality, sexual perversion minus penetration, addiction to porn, masturbation, sexual play as kids, etc. Some have been involved in occultism, marine covenants, stealing, and other vices you can think of, though the hymen is still there, that is a past that seriously need to be dealt with before marriage.
Some haven't done stuffs like that but they've done one or two things they are not proud of. It is the blood of Jesus that turns us all from sinners to saints. " For all have sinned..." Is what the Holy Bible says.
There are singles who have gone all the way, slept with guys/ladies at random, had abortions, were deeply involved in occultism, prostitution, pornography, drugs, theft, armed robbery, husband snatching, sleeping with married people, etc. How do you tell your partner about your past because they need to know about your past so there won't be surprises in marriage.
Some singles shy away from telling their partners the truth so they won't lose them. The person who genuinely loves you will stay regardless of your past. If they leave because you made a confession, they were never meant to be in your life in the first place. The earlier you come clean in your relationship and let them make up their minds either to stay or leave, the better.
One funny thing about your past is, you can't cover it forever. Sooner or later the truth leaks. It is better to be up front with your partner and tell them what they need to know before they hear from another source, by then, your marriage may end up a war zone!
Close friendship/dating stage is the best stage to tell your partner what they need to know so they can make up their minds either to propose or accept the marriage proposal.
Don't bombard them with all your stories at the beginning though. Give your relationship time and give little info at a time and watch their reaction. Some singles are not mature and have basket mouths. Ensure they can keep secrets before they go telling the whole world you've made certain mistakes.
F they cringe at the little you tell and they are acting funny, please, let them go, they are not for you. Your real life partner will accept your past without breaking down.
If you are the one who believes in "thus saith the Lord" before going into any relationship with any lady, make sure you really heard God before proposing and tell her all she needs to know before your wedding date! It won't be funny if she discovers you are impotent/ have erectile dysfunction on the wedding night or he hears you have damaged womb due to all the abortions you've had in the past a day after the wedding, that can kill any man/woman!
What are the questions you should ask in courtship before making a journey of no return into marriage? Read the engaged section of my ebook: LIES THAT BREAK MARRIAGES, it has series of questions to ask and how to ensure you are with the right person before embarking on a journey of no return.

I hope this posts is clear enough? 

Thanks for reading. God bless you. Cheers!


© Seun Oladele.

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