Friday, 25 May 2018

FEED HIS EYES.

Some men are promiscuous, no matter what you do they will steal cheat. "A cheat will always cheat", fine, that doesn't mean we should do nothing about those who are not cheating and watch our marriages end in the divorce court!
Men are moved by sight! What he sees affects him in a great way. Every woman needs to understand this and let it sink in. Some men are attracted to busts, some hips, some face, some hair. It is the responsibility of the wife to ensure he gets enough food for his eyes at home, feed his eyes!
One man ran to a man of God and complained he was always staring at women's breasts. Every where he turns, that's the first place his eyes would go. You may say he needs deliverance and call him dog, animal or whatever! You may also say all he needs is prayers and nothing more! Prayer is good but "faith without work is dead!" The man of God advised him to always look, stare and enjoy the sight of his wife's breasts for as much as he could before he left home every morning. He started doing that and it automatically cured his "lust".
My husband once employed a staff who was fond of shaking her bum all over the place. That wasn't my problem. I got something bigger and better so rivalry in that place was not my headache! I later discovered she was into married men and whenever she wanted to speak to her boss, she would sit on the desk opposite him not on a chair! I advised my perfect gentle man who hates to hurt a soul, allow the little wanderer remain in her chair to receive her instructions!
Her tempo was increasing. Hubby told me he was checking the classes (he is a proprietor) and on getting to a particular place, he saw his staff with skirt down and only her underwear remaining. She weakly attempted to wear her skirt on seeing him! He said he left the place immediately and never looked back. I then discovered this girl is becoming a threat.
One day, hubby told me he clearly he wanted me to start sleeping naked. I wasn't used to that all my life. Even as a spinster living in my own apartment before marriage, I always slept fully clothed! I adjusted fast and started sleeping stark naked! I noticed a heave of relief when I started doing that and he was calm, satisfied and completely at peace. The lady was eventually sacked!
Not every man go about chasing ladies! Some ladies love to hunt married men including your husband. Fast and pray for him but also do everything within your power give him good, quality food for his eyes. Let him see you the way he wants to. Stop hiding your body from him! Stop tying wrapper from morning till night! Stop sleeping clothed! Wear lingerie in the bedroom if that is what he wants!
Let him boast about his wife! Some men will boast to their friends, "there is nothing any girl have there that my wife doesn't have!". Turn him on and let him upload and download on you as often as he wants. The man should also do everything in his power to satisfy your desires too. It is a two way thing.
If we can consistently do this, we will reduce the divorce in our society and have happier homes.
Don't forget to order for my ebook: LIES THAT BREAK MARRIAGES, it will help a lot. God bless you, cheers!

© Seun Oladele

BREAK THAT SOUL TIE!

If you find it difficult breaking away from your EX, you need deliverance from soul tie! Sex is so powerful! It can shatter you to a million pieces or raise you to international stardom. It all depends on who you sleep with! Sex can mar you as well as make you!
Sex is the fusion of two spirits, two souls and two bodies to become one. The fusion of your sexual organs are the least fusion you see. Bigger things happen in the spiritual realm especially when blood -the losing of virginity is involved!
Blood or no blood, you are joined together with your partner and every where you go, they follow you. There is an invisible rope that always pull you to them though you don't want to have anything to do with them anymore, that rope is soul tie!
When I counsel singles in sick, disastrous relationships to end it and they find it difficult doing so, I usually ask them, "have you had sex?" most of the time, the answer is yes! That is soul tie in action! Soul tie will make a woman stick to a man who everyone sees as a murderer! He has not married her, yet he beats her blue black and turns her to a punching bag at every slight provocation!
Soul tie will make a man stick to a cheat, whore, double dater, an arrogant, pompous, spoilt brat in the name of love! Soul tie will make a woman dump her fiancee on the wedding day and make out with an EX in an hotel! Soul tie will make a married man restless each time he sees, talk to and chat with his EX. Soul tie will make a married woman have secret meetings with an EX where they make out in the dark! Soul tie has broken so many marriages beyond repair! Soul tie has made many wealthy men paupers and once beautiful, virtuous ladies into devil incarnates! Soul tie has destroyed so many lives with countless committing suicides! Soul tie will destroy you!
When you have sex, your life is fused with that person. You begin to manifest some if not all their vices and you find it difficult leaving them when you should.
Healthy soul tie happens in marriage with the right person and with God on your side, focus amd hard work, you become a super successful, mighty force to reckone with. Marriage is the right place for a healthy soul tie!
If you are still a virgin, congratulate yourself and count yourself lucky because you save yourself lots of headache, people with past sexual experiences battle with. Pre-marital sex makes life so complicated.
If you find it difficult breaking away from abusive, dangerous, disastrous relationships as a single person or you find it difficult breaking away from your EX as a married person, you need to give your life to Jesus then consciously break every sexual covenant and soul tie you have unconsciously entered into and proclaim your liberty in christ. "For if any man be in Christ...." God bless you, cheers!


© Seun Oladele

YOU DON'T NEED TO ASK.

My husband has never asked me to kneel down for him once, I chose to do that willingly whenever he buys anything for me or I want to show gratitude.
He doesn't demand for respect. I naturally respect him from the bottom of my heart. His actions, the words that come out of his mouth, his character, godly attitutide, purity of heart, down to earth honesty, high sense of responsibility, generousity, maturity, gentleness, humilty and servanthood naturallycommands my respect.
He is my father, my role model, my teacher, my guide. The man I look up to and wants to emulate in attitude and character. A great man of honour and dignity.
When men start demanding respect from their wives, something is wrong. In all honesty, you've lost it and you really don't deserve it. If you deserve that respect, you don't need to ask for it, it will be willingly given to you.
Character is what make us respect our husbands. It is not the shouting, beating, screaming, abuse, starvation and rape, it is character!
If you want respect, earn it! Be a man of your words, be a man of integrity! Stop telling lies, stop cheating, stop double-dating, stop flirting, smoking and drinking! Be worthy of emulation! Go out and work with your 2 hands instead of watching football from morning till night! Pay your bills, pay the children 's school fees on time. Assist your wife with chores when she's tired. Pray for her always! Be a good role model to her! Never be caught dead doing the things you don't want her to do! Be a leader, be a role model, be a man of character, virtues and integrity.
When you love your wife like Christ loves the church and consistently pray for her, you don't need to ask for respect, she will naturally,willingly and lovingly give it to you because you surely deserve it!
May the Lord help you to be the best husband to your wife!
Thanks for reading. God bless you. Cheers!


© Seun Oladele.

STOP MISUNDERSTANDING US!

Some young men have been reaching out to me for help on how to end a relationship with ladies who misunderstood their friendship, went completely overboard, send romantic messages, disturb them with unwanted calls, call them pet or romantic names, chase them all over the places, appear desperate and eventually become nuisance in their lives!
Some confused ladies have been asking me what to do when a guy is obviously in love with them, shows care and affection, he is all over them, yet he is not proposing!
They keep hanging on and waiting, hoping he proposes so they won't go into another relationship then he realizes his mistake and start pressuring them for a relationship!
The guy thinks he is just being a friend, the lady strongly believes he is in love, he is just not proposing yet! The guy later sensed she is all over him and tries to move back, the lady saw his cold feet and chases harder, confused and scared he ran harder, she chased harder! Perplexed, he ends the relationship and got engaged to a lady of his choice, jilted, she felt heart broken, used and abandoned!
The problem of this relationship from the guys' side is 'game playing', curiosity and 'let me see how she will respond' kind of approach. You appear like a close friend, talk intimately with her, show her unnecessary love, care and affection and watch her lap it all which gives you a kind of emotional high! She falls in love and starts reciprocating, that is when you suddenly realize she is not your type and decides to move back.
Low self esteem is the capital problem of these ladies. You lack self confidence, dignity and value. Once a guy shows a little interest, you leap and jump at him, hoping he likes you, chase you and propose to you. When he refuses to do that, you chase him hard, this makes a man see you as desperate and having serious problems, scared and confused, he moves far away from you.
The solution to this problem is simple. Guys, stop giving wrong signals, make your conversations as platonic and cordial as possible. No use of "dear", "sweetheart", "I love you", "I miss you" and all those unnecessary compliments. If you are not interested in her stop sampling! If you are not ready, face your studies and when you are ready, pray, date and propose, simple!
Lady, stop running after guys okay? Don't take his "I love you", "I miss you" and all his bla...bla...serious until he proposes! Until he boldly says, "will you marry me?" The door of your heart is opened to any interested candidate!
A friend was angry years back when he saw my engagement ring. He had been interested but I was not aware. What's my business? As long as he didn't propose, I was under no obligation to chase other interested candidates away from me!
For ladies who believe the guy is God's will for them, ask God to reveal His will to the guy too and stop manipulating that guy to notice you! Stop chasing him around and telling him to his face you are madly in love with him when he doesn't care you even exist! The rejection that usually follows such folly can shatter you to a million pieces! God is not an author of confusion! If He is the one who spoke to you, He will speak to the guy at the right time so go relax, face your business and let God do His job.
Ladies, stop misunderstanding young men's friendship. Stop taking things overboard. Stop reading meaning into his messages and calls. Guys, stop leading ladies on. You are just a brother in Christ and a pure, platonic friend, no more, no less! Stop all those affectionate words if you know you won't marry her. You won't like it if a lady leads you on and "dumps" you for a "better" guy. A little word is enough for the wise. God bless you. Cheers!

© Seun Oladele

DATING VERSUS COURTSHIP, WHAT IS THE DIFFERENCE?

Can a Christian date? This is a controversial topic here in Nigeria because of our religious setting and lots of singles are very confused when it comes to this game of love and picking the right partner.
Personally, I see nothing bad in dating as long as it is not abused. Dating is simply a process of finding out if your friend is suitable for a long term relationship (marriage) with you while courtship is a relationship based on a formal agreement to marry each other after the man had proposed and the woman has accepted. For courtship to exist, the man tells you CLEARLY (not beating around the bush) in whatever style that suits him (definitely not during sex that is not marriage proposal it is insanity) that he wants to marry you and you clearly said YES, courtship begins on that note. From the moment forward, you separate each other from others and know you have a committed relationship with someone you want to spend the rest of your life with.
Dating however, is picking one out of your friends. (Actually, you should marry one of your friends, your BEST FRIEND), you spend time with them, take them out, study them and try to find out if both of you are compatible and suitable for marriage, if not, you let them go.
HERE IS THE CAUTION:
1. DATING IS NOT FOR TEENAGERS: doing boyfriend and girlfriend is not dating at all. You are not trying to find out if you can marry them. Marry? You should be facing your studies for crying out loud. You are simply exploring your feelings which is not stable yet, admiring their physical features, get aroused sexually, have sex and move to someone else. Nothing serious to talk about except look into each others eyes and say sweet nothings that contributes absolutely nothing to your future.
2. NO SEX. There is no basis for that. You have no commitment to this person. They can choose to walk out of your life without any apology. There is no formal agreement between both of you to spend the rest of your life together.
3. ONLY 50% OR LESS OF YOUR HEART IS INVOLVED: No commitment, you are not yet in a formal relationship. Lots of ladies suffer heart breaks giving 100% of their hearts to a man who is just finding out if he will marry them. They thought they are courting because he takes them out. Come on baby, you can't assume for a man, until he clearly asks you to marry him and you accept his proposal, he can walk out of your life, any day, any time.
4. DON'T DOUBLE-DATE, IT'S WRONG. Lots of singles are even double courting. They don't want to put all their eggs in one basket to avoid being hurt. It is a sign of immaturity and unfaithfulness. You have the potential to commit adultery in marriage.
There are different schools of thought when it comes to dating especially for Christians. Some believe, dating is testing God. It's better you wait for God to expressly tell you whom you are to marry, while you as a lady shouldn't be involved with any guy, just ask God if any opposite sex who comes to you is God's will. If you are lucky he is the one, you start courting and the courtship must not be more than 6 months then you get married. While it is good to hear God and you MUST hear God before you marry someone, this method makes a relationship so dry and marriage so boring and unromantic. It is one of the reasons so many marriages of Christian couples lack romance and genuine intimacy.
To have a healthy relationship in marriage, you should have good, godly, platonic, holy relationship with both genders: your same sex friends and opposite sex friends. Friendship with the opposite sex will help you understand the opposite gender before you get married, it helped me a lot.
One of your friends may later give you more attention, spend more time with you, prefers you above others, compliment you a lot, tell you things they like about you that makes you different, fall in love with you (dating), prays about you to know if you are the one, you pray about it to know if they are God's will for you. If he is not God's will, dating ends, if he is God's will, you accept the marriage proposal and courtship begins.
There are different meaning, interpretations and presentations of dating. Just as there are godly and ungodly courtship, there are godly and ungodly dating. Dating in itself is not bad, it is the way people go about it that makes it look bad.
All in all, do what you are comfortable with. If you believe in dating, date wisely and purely, if you are not, wait till you get a signal from heaven before you go ahead with the person.
All in all, God's will is the ultimate. Pray for God's will before you marry anybody and don't marry blindly, you must ask questions and find out if both of you are compatible before you say I do. God bless you. Cheers!


© Seun Oladele